I don't know what's wrong with me (well I do, but). I felt like I was handling this pretty well, but today has been tough. Justin went to work today and being alone, I just dwelled all day. I am thinking there needs to be a stopping point. It used to be that we would not do IVF due to the expense (that was the stopping point), then we inherited money and money was not an issue. Plus we found we could do it for about 2/3 the cost normally. I don't know if I can take anymore losses. It is the hardest thing. I want to be hopeful that it will happen for us, but right now, I see no light at the end of the tunnel.
I hope the exercise helps me over this hump. I said before that I was not so devastated, but I guess I am. A loss no matter how early is heartbreaking.
1 comment:
Sarah,
A loss is heartbreaking at any stage. It doesn't matter if you have or have not had a child, what week of pregnancy it is- it doesn't matter. I think the first few days go by and you think " this isn't bad" but you have already spent time "planning" your new life with baby and it takes sometime to get over that. After we lost Autumn in '07, it took me a good year to come to terms with the whole thing. I pray this happens quicker for you and that your "hump" will go away sooner, but take heart, your healing. I am so sorry that you had to experience this. I will tell you that I am blessed that it happened. I was SO changed-spiritually by the experience that I am glad that I walked through that vally of the shadow. Praying for you!
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